17th September 1907
My dear Sophie & Robert
I have just returned
from England where I have been
for the last two months to try & get
rested & strong again I should
have written before I went but I
was too sick & sad to do so
& have kept putting off the evil
dear people that I have left Amy
we have not seen or written to
each other for three months & there
seems no chance for our ever
meeting again she does not wish
it so that ends it.
Now I want your advice
about getting something to do
the doctor will not let me nurse
or do settlement work for at least
But if I do not do something I shall fret myself
into a grave or lunatic asylum.
Boston is out of the question and I feel up
a tree about light work for I must do something
for I cannot afford to live at home.
Of course I might teach in a private school
if it had not been so late in the year. You see
I am quite in the dark as what to do that
is easy – So I wonder if that clever Robert
can help me I can put my hand to any kind
of a plough. We think if I could get something
to do in Washington or any town south of N. Y.
I should get through the winter all right, of
course I would give anything to be near you
& Robert for I am very lonly – I feel that the
bottom had dropped out of the universe & there is
no use in wanting to live any more.
Its a great pity suicide is out of fashion
There I am getting gloomy & that is owing
to the fact that I have been sea sick ever since
kept in bed.
I know that you will not be
angry with me for asking your
advice, but I feel that you both
have been ill too so that you
Just think if I had had my
way & gone on the trip with you
this would not have happened.
Write & tell all that you have
help me a lot all about your
I am not going to do anything
until I hear from you for I feel
that your advice is best.