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Letter from Abigail Adams to John Adams, 11 February 1784
" . . . f the Six Years have been Spent in America . The airy delusive phantom Hope, how has she eluded my prospects. And my expectations of your return from month to month, have vanished You invite me to you, you call me to follow you, the most earnest wish of my soul is to be with you -- but you can scarcly form an Idea of the conflict of my mind. It appears to me such an enterprize . . . " full document...