Diary of Charles Francis Adams, volume 5

Monday. 28th.

Wednesday. 30th.

Tuesday. 29th. CFA Tuesday. 29th. CFA
Tuesday. 29th.

Another cool morning. I remained here doubtful about returning in the afternoon when a heavy thunder shower came up and settled the question. Our day was quiet and uninterrupted. I read Madame de Maintenon and a little of Goethe besides Ovid.

Had some conversation with my father respecting his situation and my brother John’s. He talked very fully and materially altered the impressions I had previously obtained. Perhaps there is no better subject for constant reflection to me, than the history of our family from the middle of the last Century, and it may profitably extend itself into all the branches. My duties are fearfully heavy. The continuation of the respectability of our name depends much upon me and its distinction entirely. I feel myself unlikely to do much for the latter. My habits are too speculative, my feelings not at all inclined to court the public gale. In all these reflections, I have only to sustain my courage the idea that I have been much blessed by the goodness of the Deity hitherto, and a consequent hope that he will continue the same in future. What a fallible creature is man, and how much he needs protection from himself as well as from others!