Having prosecuted my studies with attention for three days, as I was about to go to the bottom of the matter and become thorough master of the different kinds of evidence on the 21st, John2
put a letter from Richardson3
into my hand dated at New York, stating that he had changed his mind upon the receipt of my last
and that he was at his post surprised at my not having arrived, and requesting me to start directly as Tudor and he should certainly expect me. Phillips’ Evidence was thrown to one corner of the room in a moment, and I gave orders for the immediate packing of my trunk, in order to take the first Stage, which did not start however until the next Morning. The remainder of the day however found me entirely unfit to do any thing but wish it over and this the more as both Mary and Madame were confined to their rooms, which made the House seem dull. I had been wishing for something like an absence as our family had become exceedingly disjointed and uncomfortable. Indeed I never saw a family which has so little of the associating disposition if it can so be called. The circumstance arises from a connection of incidents going back many years which I could not relate here, and which indeed I do not think I have ever related in a connected manner although, God knows, I have been pretty deeply both actor and sufferer. I am therefore not much attached to family and much more happy when independent of it.