Morning exercises performed as usual. I took my last sitting at Mr. King’s today, and am not well satisfied with the result. But as it is not for me, I have felt less interest in it although I would wish [word or words missing]
for the sake of the family, at least those of it who wish me well. My day was broken, I could not go through my prescribed duties, indeed there has been no day yet in which I have thoroughly adhered to them. But they will do, if only partially pursued, and in future I have less impediment. I wrote to Abby the
answer to her’s of yesterday. And in the evening I went through one of those disagreeable scenes which occur sometimes in life. No man of sense will ever keep a Mistress. For if she is valuable, the separation when it comes is terrible, and if she is not, she is more plague than profit. Ever since my engagement, I have been preparing for a close of my licentious intrigues, and this evening I cut the last cord which bound me.1
What a pity that experience is always to be learnt over and over by each succeeding generation.