I sit down to record the Journal of this day with an aching heart and a depressed mind. The gloom which surrounds me in all my reflections, it is impossible to shake off. Went to the Office as usual and into Court. Upon my return from which as there was nothing of interest going on, I found Mr. Brooks who was here to tell me of an accident which had happened, the News of which had just arrived by the public papers. I was totally unprepared for such a shock, and it seemed to turn the current of my blood. I felt no other emotion excepting the chill under the skin which seems to be like it’s stagnation. My poor brother George had either accidentally or in a fit of derangement, signs of which he had previously manifested, gone over from the Deck of the Franklin on her way to New York. I could not realize it at all. I went to see Harriet Welsh and Mr. Brooks for advice. It was recommended to me to remain here, and the first talked to me in a manner which I shall long remember. This feeling is the lot of us all, but when a blow like
this comes unexpectedly, it strikes with double vehemence. I wrote a few lines to my father,1
and I bent my soul in humble and fervent prayer that God would soften the stroke upon my poor afflicted parents. They have many trials but this surpasseth them all. I remained in my room all the afternoon, attempting to divert my attention by looking over my Mother’s papers, but a sense of dullness weighed heavily upon me.