Boston Novr. 1754

Should I tell you that the world was a Scene of constant vicissitudes, I doubt not you'd readily reply, who knows not this, but still, self evident as it is, remarkable Instances gives us Occasion not only to Observe but even to declare it. Without holding you Any longer in Suspense I shall observe to you that it is the loss of a very good Freind, that Occasions this my Complaint. Whether he died a Death, Natural or Artificial, Operative or Speculative, Civil or Military, Political or Œconimical, Spiritual or Carnal, or Whether he has only made a Transit, I wot not, but that he is dead, I averr. I have made great Enquiry concerning the Manner of his death & dying Speech. Some say he died of Herisy (a disease that has been long Gnawing his Vitals) & that he left a plentiful Estate consisting of Mops, Disclouts & Ragged Garments, with advice Never to use a Neighbours Sleeve. Some say he dyed of a Distemper calld the Lives by Means of which his Inwards were all turn'd to a vivacious Animal call'd223Maggots, which were often seen, working in his Eyes, Sometimes in his Ears, but oftnest at his fingers Ends & elsewhere, till at last they seiz'd his heart & carried it off as a tumble Bug does his Load. Nothing but these Lives themselves can ever declare the Estate he has left, it consisting of Men in the Shape of Brick Bats Love in the shape of an Inkhorn, a Complicated Machine for Reducing Chocolate to a half digested consistency to expedite Animal Nurishment, one very compleatly finish'd for playing the flute; & one infinitely intricate for playing the Violin with his Toes as the piggs do Organs. And whether he did not go off in some new Modelld Machine I quære. I hear he has left me a Legacy of a curious Engine for extracting Hairs from the Brains & an Iron to solder crackt Skulls, the former being Neerly worn out, he having in the latter part of his life applied it for Killing of Maggots. I cant learn what his Exit was but by a posthumous paper it appears he complaind of the Leapings of his Heart & seriously exhorts all to use of Dr. Moss's? Worm Powder. Some say he was Murderd by an Impudent Urchin who shot him with an Arrow in his Heart, not thinking him qualified for one of his Subjects but only to try the Experimt. whether his shaft would enter, wn. to his great disappointment in sank deep. He would fain have extracted it, not willing to loose an Arrow, but his Heart soon grew big, and as the Trunk of his Body became inflated so his Face became meagre. This Poison having posses'd his Brains, made them quit their Lofty Mansions, for they began to find out they live'd in Creations Cockloft, so they betook themselves to Genteeler parts such as the Wrists the Bosom (wch. from this time became a favrite Word with him) & some say to the Heels also, however tis Certain he Broke the Dart from the Head & made a Pen of it, admirably adapted to write Acrosticks & explore Mistical Ænigmas. With the? help of an Engine he had made he would stand at a Distance & Dart Never Daring a Neer Approach. Besides in all his Atchievment in the service of the Boy he had got such an inconsistant Mesmedly of Virtue, Respect, Modesty & I know not what other silly? Words, that Cupid vex'd to find himself so Abus'd, shot Another Dart & kill'd him. As for Estate, that say he did not leave Enough to pay fun'rel Charges, so that being Unburied According to the Curse of the Antients, he wanders on the Shore, & waits on the advocates of Love Rowing them across a River in a little Barge, wch. Renders his Curse not altogether unlike that of Tantalus; his Ghost now preaches, Warning all never to Adulterate the flames of Cupid with the Pedantry & inconsistent Virtue of the Muses.224Some say he died of forgetfullness, for that not having for a long time thought of the World or Any of his Freinds in it he at last? ceased to be, slipping out as it were from the back Door of Nature. & no doubt he forgot to make a dying Speech & even to left an Estate. However before the distemper had made a thorough Progress he made his Will devising me some Powder to cure Worldly carefullness, but the he forgot to leave to pay me. In short there are so many Reports concerning his Decease that I give no heed to any of them, but being acquinted with his Constitution I conjecture he dy'd of pure Refine?. He having with Labour & pains Erected & compleated An Engine for Reducing Mankind to the Strait Paths of Reason, by Refining & Rectifying their Brains. So great were his Labours in this most pleasant Employment, & so Noxious the Steems that arose from the Inherent corruption of these Brains, put him on Refining himself in Each Process, till at last he became so Refind that his Earthy Particles Were not Sufficient to detain him. So he floated from the Earth, till he has or will arrive where the Œther is of equall density. There he no doubt will become a Mighty Comet, his head? having been observ'd to shine, this some time since, & when his Posteriour Shall became inflammated, he will no doubt drag a monstrous Tail. His dying Speech then will be many. Every Old Woman will Rehearse them & his Intaild Estate will be overtures in chh. & state, alteration in Politicks, to say nothing of the destruction of creeds. This I take to be his last Apotheosis, & according to the Calculation of the learned we may Expect a Comet in 1758?. Whether twill be the same I can't say tho' I'm inclin'd to think 'ere that Time he will be arrived at some other System.

It is this great Loss that has Occasioned me to bewail the Vicissitude of Life, & if the World as it refines flys off & becomes presager of Ruin who'd be willing to tarry here. At first I feard the Refind Souls of this World would spread thro' all space & leave nought but a sceleton but a second thought shew'd me that where one flys off one thousand gravitate to the Center, but then the more is Mist these Refined Souls. Weep with me My Friend, for in him I lost an Every Shaped Freind & if the World say he was Chimerical 'twas 'cause they knew only his Superfices, but he has carried me to his Inner Chamber where the Infinitely Complicated Wheels & Springs gave Infinitely various forms to his Soul & Body. I purpose to have a statue made in the shape of a soul intirely of Joint Work so as to present him to my veiw in all the forms I can Recollect, least in225the Multitude of Ideas I Establish no certain one. Hoping these lines will find you well I conclude.

Dft ; addressed: "To RC. allegorical of his Person."

Saturday P.M. Nov. 23, 1754 Dear Eunice,

I recd. yrs.1 & note the Contents, but have not leisure at present to enlarge. Respecting Cato, I advise not to have him dismis'd from that Employ if you can get ten pounds do; if not it may be you can get for the Winter & 10 in the Spring as Labour grows dear. So thinks Sister. This Night I sail for Falmouth2 in order to see what's to be done. Shall return speedily.3 Remember to all from yr. Loving Brother,

ROBERT TREAT PAINE

RC ; addressed: "To Miss Eunice Paine German Town"; endorsed.

1.

Not located.

2.

Falmouth, in the Province of Maine, was renamed Portland in 1786 (William Willis, The History of Portland, 2d ed. [Boston, 1865], 580–581).

3.

RTP left Boston for Maine on the evening of Nov. 24 and returned on Dec. 9. His diary records the men visited (Mr. Fox, Maj. Freeman, Mr. Longfellow, Rev. Smith, Col. Cushing, Mr. Phillips, and Mr. Waldo). On the purpose of this trip, see RTP to Thomas Paine, Dec. 10, 1754, printed below.

Boston Decr. 10th 1754 Honored Sir,

I Recd. yrs.1 per Capts. Triffery & Gay; In the last of which you complain of our neglecting to write by Capt. Nickols, the Reason of which was that abt. the same Time Capt. Homer sail'd by wm. we wrote largely.2 I am very certain that I put all the Keys into the Doctor's Chest, & the Key of the Globe case must needs be there. You left wth. me no papers but those of Ralph Morgan's relating to Cato, & the Deed of the Still house, which I got Recorded.3 I purpose to send this by Capt. Jones who will sail suddenly, by wm. Mr. Greenleaf will send you sundry things you wrote for. Since I wrote you my last I have been down to226Falmouth in order to see if there were any bread for a Lawyer. After a great deal of consultation I am determin'd to follow that practice, And inasmuch as the County of York will probably be soon divided, & Falmouth made a shire Town,4 I thought it must needs be a good place to settle in. I met with considerable Encouragment there, but I find it as expensive living as at Boston, & If I can contrive any way down there to support my self while I am persuing my studies & getting into practice, I doubt not I shall get ahead. There is but one Lawyer in that County & he lives at York;5 & if a new County be Created there must be some Lawyers & I don't doubt with diligent application to my studies I shall be qualified by that Time there being no Law books there to be borrow'd I must necessarily be at a great charge in buying; however hope my Practice will soon pay for it. With regard to mentaining my self at first, I purpose to take a small Schooll, & I can make some profit by keeping some few things to sell, & perhaps get some writing. I shall soon see if there be a prospect of much Law Business. The Gentlemen there tell me there is & encourage me considerably. I don't purpose to get behind hand, if I dont get forward by the scheme.6

I returnd yesterday Morning from Falmouth, & abt. 9 oClock I went on board Capt. Jones to see abt. shipping yr. things, & I unluckily sprained my Ancle in such a manner as obliged me to ride home, and I am now confind to my Room but hope for a speedy Recovery. This will hinder my prosecuting this scheme immediately. However being confin'd I study the closer, & have good opportunity of consulting in difficult points; I should be glad to live somewhere, that I might consult a Lawyer, but if I cant I must apply my self the closer; I remember to have heard you speak of some Land you have there. If you would write me word the circumstances of it possibly it may be recovered. I hope you are well & in agreable Circumstances. Yesterday Capt. Bruce arrived in whom came sundry officers for our Regiments here viz. Shirley's & Pepperell's & an Agent to transact the Military Business & also Orders for all half pay officers to return to Duty.7 I have not been out & so cant recite many perticulars, perhaps shall be able to inform you more by the next opportunity. Pray Sr. write me your opinion of the above recited Scheme of Living, & if you can make any amendments or propose any thing better should be glad to know yr. opinion.

I subscribe my self yr. much Obliged and Dubtifull son,

ROBERT-TREAT PAINE 227

RC ; addressed: "To Mr. Thomas Paine Mercht. Hallifax Per favr. Capt. Jones"; endorsed.

1.

Not located.

2.

The bill of lading for this shipment aboard the schooner Providence, John Homer, master, is in R. T. Paine Papers. Dated Nov. 7, 1754, it mentions three chests "&* on pair Iron Dogges."

3.

This reference is probably to the lease of Cato's services to Ralph Morgan, a Boston gentleman. The still-house was a half interest in a Boston distillery which Eunice Paine purchased from her brother-in-law, Joseph Greenleaf, on Sept. 23, 1754. She sold this back to him on Jan. 29, 1761 (Suffolk Deeds, 84:237, 96:136). See also, Thomas Paine to His Children, Halifax, June 26, 1756.

4.

Cumberland County was not erected until 1761 when Falmouth (now Portland) was made the shire town.

5.

Noah Emery (1699–1761) was Kings Attorney for the Province of Maine and actually resided at Kittery (James Deane Hopkins, "Members of the Bar of the County of Cumberland, State of Maine, from the Year 1700 to the Year 1838," American Quarterly Register 12[1840]: 274–284).

6.

RTP did not follow this course of action. Instead he went to Lancaster on Jan. 31, 1755, to live with his cousin Capt. Abijah Willard (1722–1789) and study for the law. Willard (a brother of Col, Samuel, Abel, and Levi Willard) commanded a company at Louisbourg in 1745 and another in the Nova Scotia campaign of 1755. He was appointed a mandamus councillor, but was forced to resign the position and became a commissary in the Britsh army. As a loyalist Willard later settled in Lancaster, New Brunswick, where he became a member of the Council of that province (Lorenzo Sabine, Biographical Sketches of Loyalists of the American Revolution, 2 vols. [Boston, 1864], 2:429–430; Willard, Willard Genealogy, 58–59).

7.

These orders together with a list of the officers are printed in The Boston Weekly News-Letter, Dec. 5, 1754.